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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28982898">What If...</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/FiveFootTwo/pseuds/FiveFootTwo'>FiveFootTwo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Virgin River (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:06:49</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>12,721</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28982898</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/FiveFootTwo/pseuds/FiveFootTwo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of one shots exploring how things might have happened differently from scenes we saw on the show. First up, what if Mel had kissed Jack the night she was attacked while he was fixing the pillows behind her?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Melinda Monroe/Jack Sheridan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>46</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…Mel had kissed Jack when he was fixing the pillows behind her the night she was attacked?</p><p>Mel shifts in bed, trying to adjust the pillows behind her when one of them falls to the floor. "Here, let me," Jack says as he places the pillow back on the bed, his face only inches from hers. Their eyes lock, and Mel feels an unmistakable surge of desire rush through her body, her eyes darting between his eyes and his lips. He freezes, unable to look away, and she sees her desire reflecting in his clear blue eyes. Her heart starts pounding, and before she can change her mind, she places her palms on either side of his face and pulls him closer, giving him a quick kiss before retreating, waiting to gauge his reaction.</p><p>"Mel?" he whispers, a question. Is this ok? Are you sure? What does this mean? She can see the uncertainty marring his expression. Before she can think, she kisses him again, this time opening her mouth to his. It takes a second for him to react, and she feels his tongue slip between her lips, kissing her deeply. He is leaning over her, careful not to disturb her injured ankle. This time it is him who breaks the kiss.</p><p>"Are you sure you're ok?" he breathes, leaning his forehead against hers.</p><p>She nods, "Yes," she insists weakly, but he is not fooled.</p><p>"Do you want me to stay?" he asks.</p><p>"Yes," she admits, not meeting his gaze. He shucks off his jacket, placing it on the hook by the door before returning to her side. She pats the space on the bed next to her, and he removes his shoes before climbing in, propping up a pillow behind himself so that he can sit upright alongside her. He hears her sniffle and looks at her just as a tear begins its path down her cheek.</p><p>"Hey," he says, taking her hand in his, "You're ok, I'm not going anywhere. You're safe."</p><p>"I know," she says, wiping her tears away with her free hand. "It isn't that. It's just that…" she trails off.</p><p>"You can tell me anything," he reminds her, squeezing her hand gently for reassurance.</p><p>"I know," she replies. "That's the problem," she adds, under her breath.</p><p>"Mel," he whispers, raising their joined hands to his lips and kissing the back of her hand.</p><p>She sighs, "This would be a lot easier if you weren't so wonderful," she tells him.</p><p>"What?" he laughs in surprise.</p><p>"This, all of it," she replies. "You, Charmaine, the baby. I would have just stayed in L.A. and never returned. But I couldn't."</p><p>"Why not?" he wonders.</p><p>"Because I missed you," she says quietly.</p><p>"I missed you, too," he replies, "More than you know."</p><p>She turns to look at him now, her eyes still filled with unshed tears. Their eyes lock once more, and she feels it, this magnetic pull she always feels whenever she is close to him. He leans in, resting his forehead against hers.</p><p>"I'm not ready," she whispers. "I'm sorry. I know I'm being unfair to you."</p><p>"No," he insists, "You've been through a lot. More than I could even imagine…" he trails off before continuing. "Would things be any different if Charmaine weren't pregnant?" he asks quietly.</p><p>"I don't know," she answers honestly. "I care about you," she tells him, "A lot."</p><p>"But?" he questions.</p><p>"But I'm afraid," she adds.</p><p>"Of what?" he asks.</p><p>"Of this," she gestures between the two of them. "Of letting myself love you. What if I lose you, too? What if I can't give you what you deserve? I'm so broken, Jack."</p><p>"You're not broken, you're perfect," he insists, putting his arm around her and pulling her closer. She relaxes into him, resting her head on his shoulder.</p><p>"I am far from perfect," she replies. She sits up, gazing into his eyes, and her heart begins pounding again. "You're really not making this easy, you know that?" And with that, she kisses him.</p><p>Jack tries to hold himself back, he really does, but the feeling of her lips on his ignites something within him, and he presses his mouth against hers, his tongue tracing the seam of her lips. Then she does something unexpected, she half sighs, half moans into his mouth, and he swears it is the sexiest sound he has ever heard in his life. He twists towards her, hovering over her as she leans back onto the pillows, and kisses her deeply. Her hands are in his hair, anchoring his mouth to hers.</p><p>He breaks the kiss, wanting her more than he can say, but also knowing that she isn't ready. He leans his forehead against hers, trying to calm himself. "Mel," he breathes, opening his eyes to look into hers.</p><p>"I know," she whispers, her eyes filling with tears.</p><p>"Hey," he says, "What is it?"</p><p>"I'm just…overwhelmed," she replies, softly. "You're so wonderful, Jack."</p><p>He laughs halfheartedly. "Only when I am with you," he says, kissing her forehead and pulling her close again, holding her against his chest. "When I heard you screaming, it was like a knife stabbing me through my chest. If anything ever happened to you…"</p><p>"I know," she answers. "It's how I feel about you too, but I'm ok, Jack. You saved me, again."</p><p>"I would die before I let anything happen to you," he says honestly, and she knows it is the truth.</p><p>"Will you stay with me tonight?" she asks tentatively, turning to look at him. "Will you just…hold me?"</p><p>"As long as you want," he replies reassuringly. "How is your ankle?"</p><p>"Still a little sore, but feeling better. Must be the ibuprofen," she adds. She looks around the cabin, nervously. "I want to change into my pajamas, but I don't know if I can do it myself."</p><p>"Do you want me to help you?" he asks. "I promise to be on my best behavior," he adds, his eyes sparkling.</p><p>She directs him to find her pajamas in the dresser, and he helps her into the bathroom so that she can change. When she emerges, teeth brushed and face clean of makeup, he marvels that she is still the most beautiful woman that he's ever seen.</p><p>"What?" she asks when she catches him staring at her.</p><p>"You're beautiful," he says honestly, and she blushes.</p><p>"Jack," she murmurs, giving him a once over before she says, "I'm sorry that I don't have anything more comfortable for you to sleep in."</p><p>"It's ok," he replies. "I usually don't wear pajamas. Just a pair of shorts or pants is all. I'll be fine."</p><p>He disappears in the bathroom to freshen up and returns with his flannel shirt unbuttoned. Now it is Mel's turn to stare as he walks around the bed and sits on the edge as he removes his jeans and his shirt, leaving him only in a pair of boxer briefs.</p><p>Mel bites her lower lip and her eyes rake over his body as he stands and gets into bed, pulling the covers over him. "Oh, I'm sorry," he says to her as he takes in her expression, "Is this too much? Or not enough?"</p><p>"I'm not complaining," she says, biting her lip again, and it takes everything in his power not to devour her right then and there. She blushes, unable to meet his eyes, and he reaches out, tilting her chin up and forcing her to look at him.</p><p>"What is it?" he asks.</p><p>"You're beautiful," she tells him, echoing his words, and he smiles.</p><p>"Well," he whispers, his voice smooth like silk, "Looks like we belong together then."</p><p>She kisses him then, lightly at first, but it soon deepens. His hands are in her hair, holding her close, as hers explore his bare chest. He shivers at her touch, emitting a moan from deep in his throat that only serves to spur her on more. Abruptly, she breaks the kiss, breathing hard as she leans her head against his. "I'm so sorry," she murmurs.</p><p>"Never be sorry for that," he amends, and she smiles. He pulls her into a hug, cradling her against his body as they snuggle underneath the covers. She places her ear over his heart, loving the sound of it beating. She trails her fingertips lightly over his chest and sides, and she hears his heart stutter and begin beating rapidly, a smile forming on her lips.</p><p>"Thank you," she whispers into the darkness of the room.</p><p>"For what?" he asks.</p><p>"For saving me tonight. For being amazing. For always being there when I need you," she replies.</p><p>He smiles, wrapping his arms more tightly around her. "Always," he replies, as they drift off to sleep in each other's arms.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…Mel didn't tell Jack she wasn't ready the morning after their first time together?</p><p>Jack gazes over at her sleeping form, smiling to himself at how beautiful she looks in the early morning sunshine streaming through the window. "Hey," he says quietly, not wanting to startle her. Her eyelids flutter, "Hey," he says again, and she opens her eyes to look at him. Slowly, her lips curve into a smile as she registers his presence. He leans over and presses a gentle kiss to her lips, brushing his nose lightly against hers before retreating.</p><p>"I'm so sorry," she says, rolling onto her back to look at the ceiling.</p><p>"For what?" he asks.</p><p>"For this, I shouldn't have let things get this far," she clarifies.</p><p>"It's ok," he says, his heart breaking a little, "You weren't ready."</p><p>"I wasn't," she agrees. He raises his hand, tucking a loose strand of her hair behind her ear.</p><p>"I'll wait," he says softly, and she gives him a slight smile in return.</p><p>"You know, once the baby is born, your life is gonna change more than you can ever imagine," she continues.</p><p>"I'm never gonna change how I feel about you," he insists.</p><p>"You don't know how you're going to feel when you and Charmaine become parents," she studies his face. "Raising a baby together can create a bond that's completely unexpected. You can't-"</p><p>"No matter what happens I'm not gonna stop wanting you," he interrupts. "I'm in love with you," he says, his sincerity reaching into parts of her heart that she thought had long ago stopped beating.</p><p>Fear momentarily grips her, the reality of the situation bearing down on her, "I'm sorry, I'm not ready," she tells him.</p><p>"You'll get there," he says with complete confidence.</p><p>"Can we try to be friends?" she asks.</p><p>"I'll do my best," he says, with a weak smile.</p><p>"Thank you," she says, and she knows she should feel relieved, but something in his expression nearly breaks her.</p><p>"Considering I'm just a friend," he says, trying to keep the mood light, "I should probably put my pants on," he jokes, studying her.</p><p>"Yeah," she smiles at him, and he nods.</p><p>"Ok," he agrees, kissing her hand lightly. But she sees it in his eyes, the disappointment, the heartache, and she hates that she's the one making him feel that way. He sits on the edge of the bed, retrieving his boxers from the floor and stepping into them.</p><p>"I'm afraid," she says to his back. She rolls to stare up at the ceiling, unable to look him in the eye. He doesn't turn around.</p><p>"Of what?" he asks calmly.</p><p>"Of this, of losing you, of loving again," she admits, "Of never being able to give you the family that you deserve."</p><p>He turns around at this, "Mel," he says quietly. "I just want you, nothing else."</p><p>"You say that now, but you don't know," she replies.</p><p>He climbs back into bed beside her, clad only in his boxers as he takes her hand. "Look at me," he insists, and when she does he continues, "If you really want to be just friends, then that's what I'll do. Can you honestly tell me that last night meant nothing? Because it wasn't nothing to me, it was everything."</p><p>She sighs, turning around in bed to face him. "I wasn't thinking at first. I just wanted to feel something that wasn't sadness. And there you were, being wonderful, taking care of me, and suddenly I wanted you so much that I couldn't breathe. I needed you, Jack."</p><p>"I needed you, too," he admits quietly, holding her hand in his.</p><p>"And it was so…incredible," she continues. "God, Jack, this doesn't even make sense! I must be insane! The headline could read 'Widow Has Best Night of Her Life and then Throws It All Away'," she quips, laughing weakly.</p><p>"It was the best night of my life, too," he says honestly, and this earns him a smile.</p><p>"And I felt…guilty somehow," she tells him. "Like I don't deserve this. Like I'm somehow betraying Mark."</p><p>She notices how he flinches at the sound of Mark's name, but he doesn't acknowledge it. Instead he says, "I understand."</p><p>"God, I'm such a mess. You deserve so much more than I can give you, Jack," she grips his hands in hers, almost begging him.</p><p>He stares at her for a long while, his eyes darting between her gaze and her lips, and he moves close to her until they are only an inch apart. "See, here's the thing," he begins, "I am in love with you. I want you, more than I've ever wanted anyone or anything. And I know you feel it, too. Because last night, you were completely with me." And with that, he kisses her.</p><p>Mel melts into the kiss, pulling him flush against her body, his bare chest rubbing against the thin material of her shirt. She can feel his desire for her as his body reacts to the kiss, and she wants him again so much she feels like she might explode with the force of her emotions. His hands trail up under her shirt and she breaks the kiss. "Take it off," she murmurs before pushing him backwards until he is on his back and she is hovering over him, trembling with her need for him.</p><p>"Are you sure?" he asks, his eyes questioning.</p><p>"Yes," she replies, "Oh God, yes," she repeats.</p><p>He groans as she moves to straddle him, and soon they are moving together once more.</p><p>Afterwards, they collapse onto the mattress, both breathing heavily as they try to catch their breaths. "So," he says, grinning, "I don't think we are doing all that well just being friends. What do you think?"</p><p>"It's all your fault," she teases back. "You had to go and be phenomenal. Mediocre, I could have handled. Good, even. But not phenomenal."</p><p>He laughs, "You're amazing, Mel. I don't even have the words. And us together…wow."</p><p>"I second that," she says, rolling on her side to look at him. "So, are we really doing this?" she asks. "Are you sure?"</p><p>"More sure than I've ever been about anything," he replies honestly.</p><p>"But Charmaine—" she stops when he places his finger on her lips.</p><p>"No," he says firmly, "She is not going to get between us. I won't let her. When the baby is born, it's you I want by my side, Mel. We'll figure it out, I promise."</p><p>"Jack," she whispers, trying to convey everything she is feeling with a single word. She bites her lower lip, looking conflicted for a moment before kissing him softly. "I love you," she tells him.</p><p>"You do?" he asks, incredulous.</p><p>"Of course I do," she replies. "I wouldn't be here if I didn't. I would have stayed in L.A., but I knew it before then, even if I wouldn't admit it to myself."</p><p>"I have loved you from the first moment that I saw you," he says. "I just knew. When did you know?"</p><p>"I liked you immediately, that's for sure. But I knew it was something more than that when I was jealous of Charmaine," she explains.</p><p>"You were jealous?" he asks.</p><p>"Yes, very," she replies. "Especially now."</p><p>"Why now?" Jack wonders. "You know, I never loved her. We didn't even have a real relationship, at least for me it wasn't one. I should have ended things with her as soon as I met you."</p><p>"Because she's having your child," Mel replies, so quietly he almost doesn't hear her.</p><p>"Oh, Mel," he says, reaching for her and pulling her into his chest. "I'm so sorry," he adds. His fingertips trail lightly down her back, causing her to shiver even though he leaves a trail of fire on every inch of bare skin he touches. She doesn't say anything, and he searches for the right way to tell her how much she means to him. "Remember that day we were walking around Lily's farm?"</p><p>"Yes, of course," she replies, pressing a light kiss to his chest.</p><p>"And you said that your dream when you were little was to be a vet, and have a big farmhouse and fill it with kids?" he continues.</p><p>"Wow, you have a good memory," she replies.</p><p>"I remember everything about you," he replies, threading his fingers into her hair. "It was then that I realized that you're my dream. Just meeting you. Falling in love with you. I never thought it was possible, for me at least."</p><p>"Oh, Jack," she whispers, her eyes filling with tears.</p><p>"And that's how I know that it will all work out," he says, "You'll see." He kisses her passionately once more, a low moan in his throat, and it takes everything in her power to pull back this time.</p><p>"As much as I hate to say it, I have to get ready for work," she replies. "I actually need to go check on Charmaine."</p><p>"Ugh," he replies, groaning into her neck before beginning to kiss his way down her body.</p><p>"Jack," she warns, but she is laughing. "If you don't stop, I'm never going to get out of this bed."</p><p>"You don't hear me complaining," he says, and she playfully pushes him away. "Seriously, I need to shower and get dressed."</p><p>"Well, I need to shower too," he says, "So you know what would save some time?" he grins, and she squeals as he chases her into the bathroom.</p><p>It turns out they are both late to work that morning.</p><p>Mel cannot stop smiling when she arrives at Hope's house to check on Charmaine, and the older woman knows immediately that something is different with her. Mel tries to play it cool all morning, but when she runs into Jack on the way back to the cabin, she immediately feels that familiar attraction to him, now even stronger than ever.</p><p>"Well, hey there stranger," Jack flirts as she jumps down onto the driveway, "Long time no see."</p><p>"If I'm not mistaken, you just saw a lot more of me than anyone else in town ever will," she quips back, raising her eyebrows at him and smiling.</p><p>"Let's keep it that way," he replies, moving toward her and wrapping his arms around her waist. He kisses her, softly at first, but it quickly deepens. Mel pulls away, and he leans his forehead against hers, giving her a look that nearly makes her tear off his clothes right there in Hope's driveway.</p><p>"Jack," she murmurs scoldingly, before leaning up and whispering in his ear, "Later."</p><p>He gives her another quick peck before opening the car door for her and she slips inside, waving to him through the window.</p><p>Neither of them notices Charmaine, glaring at them through the window of Hope's house.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>...Mel's sister-in-law Stacey didn't interrupt her conversation with Jack the night after the picnic?</p><p>She hears a knock on the door, and opens it to reveal Jack standing there, smiling. "It's official," he says with a smile, "You lost your marbles."</p><p>She laughs, "Ooh, I was wondering where my sanity had gone!" she jokes back, taking the jar of marbles from him and setting them on the coffee table.</p><p>"Well, see, that's just one more example of why you can't live without Jack Sheridan," he flirts, and a familiar warmth settles in the depths of Mel's stomach.</p><p>"Um, I went to see Charmaine," she tells him.</p><p>"How did that go?" Jack asks skeptically.</p><p>"Um, not great," Mel admits, "Yeah. But at least I said my piece."</p><p>"And do you feel better?" he asks.</p><p>"No, not really," she admits with a smile.</p><p>"Well, my mom says you can't control what other people do, only how you react to it," Jack says.</p><p>"Well, your mom sounds like a very wise woman," Mel replies.</p><p>"Oh, she's a firecracker," Jack grins. "She'd love you. Maybe you'll get to meet her someday."</p><p>"Yeah, maybe," Mel replies shyly, looking down at the floor, trying to calm the butterflies in her stomach that form every time she is around him. He stands there looking at her, his hands shoved deep in his pockets. "Do you want to stay for a drink?" she asks him. "I have wine, coffee, and water," she adds.</p><p>"Sure," he replies, shifting nervously from one foot to the other. "Wine would be great, thanks."</p><p>"Make yourself at home," she tells him as she goes into the kitchen to get him a glass, plus a bowl of pretzels, and returns, placing both on the coffee table as they sit on the couch.</p><p>"Listen," he begins, "I wanted to apologize again for Charmaine. It's just that she asked me point-blank, and I didn't want to lie to her. I mean, we are having twins together, and I'm trying to keep my relationship with her as amicable as possible considering the situation. I don't discuss my personal life with her, I never have."</p><p>"It's ok," Mel replies. "I understand." She pauses, staring down at her hands in her lap. "She thinks I slept with you on purpose to steal you from her."</p><p>"That's ridiculous," he says. "She and I broke up over a month ago. And honestly, I never considered her and I to be in a relationship. It was casual, for me at least."</p><p>"I know," Mel replies. "She also told me I wasn't going to win this."</p><p>"Win what, exactly?" Jack asks.</p><p>"You," Mel replies softly, finally looking at him. He sees the uncertainty in her expression, the fear. "I told her it wasn't a competition, for the record. That I only wanted what is best for you."</p><p>"And what do you think that is?" he asks, his voice dropping an octave.</p><p>"I don't know," she whispers.</p><p>"Yes, you do," he replies, softly, staring at her intently before lifting her chin so that she meets his gaze. She shifts away from him slightly.</p><p>"I told her that I fully support you becoming a father, because I do, Jack," she adds.</p><p>"I know you do," he replies. For a moment, neither of them speaks. "You know, I can talk to her, if you want," he says, breaking the silence.</p><p>"No, it's ok," she replies. "You need to maintain a positive relationship with her." There's another awkward silence, and they both reach for the pretzels at exactly the same time, their fingers brushing. Jack rests his hand over hers, still holding it as he leans back and settles into the couch, and she leans into his side.</p><p>"You know, as your friend," he begins, lightly tracing her fingers with his thumb, "Can I just say that you looked stunning in that dress. I couldn't take my eyes off you. You know, in a purely friendly and platonic way."</p><p>She laughs, despite herself. "Thank you," she whispers, looking at him. She looks down at their joined hands, their thighs touching on the couch, and she feels tingly everywhere they touch. Her mind flashes back to Charmaine telling her she wouldn't win this, that Jack would choose his children over her. She gazes deep into his eyes, trying to read his expression, but all she sees reflecting back is love. "Maybe he's your second chance," she hears Joey's voice echoing in her head.</p><p>"Are you ok?" he asks, his concern for her always paramount.</p><p>She nods, unable to speak. And so, she tries to convey everything she is thinking and feeling in that moment and condense in into a single word. "Jack."</p><p>His heart stutters and skips a beat before it begins pounding in his chest. If he heard no other sound for the rest of his life except his name on her lips, he would be the happiest man alive. Without even realizing it, he leans toward her, and she does the same, until they collide somewhere in the middle, her lips on his. She threads her fingers through the hair at the back of his neck, anchoring his mouth to hers. Using every bit of willpower he has, he breaks this kiss.</p><p>"Mel," he whispers, "Are you sure?" I can't handle you pushing me away again, he thinks but doesn't say.</p><p>She studies him for a moment before walking across the room and turning off the lights, the cabin only lit by the fire in the fireplace. She moves to stand in front of him, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Yes," she says, and suddenly his lips are on hers again, kissing her passionately. "Mmm," she purrs, and this only serves to spur him on further. He shrugs off her cardigan, his hands trailing up under her shirt as he walks her backwards towards the bed. She removes his shirt, running her hands over his bare chest.</p><p>"I have thought of nothing but you ever since that night," he says in between kisses. "God, Mel. I want you so much. I have since the moment we met."</p><p>"Jack," she says again, his name a plea. He stops his ministrations and pulls back to look at her.</p><p>"I love you," he tells her.</p><p>She kisses him deeply, and he picks her up bridal style, carrying her to the bed. He places her on top of the mattress and hovers over her. She reaches up, pulling his lips to hers as they kiss passionately. His hands and lips are everywhere except where she needs them, and soon she is squirming impatiently beneath him.</p><p>"Jack," she murmurs as he kisses his way down her neck, "Considering you're not just a friend anymore, could you lose the pants?"</p><p>He chuckles, looking down at her, his eyes sparkling in amusement. "Ladies first," he says mischievously as he kisses his way down her body, his fingers gripping the waistband of her leggings. He slides her pants and underwear down her legs slowly, taking his time to kiss each inch of bare skin he reveals along the way. He tosses the offending garments to the floor, and she reaches for him, panting.</p><p>"You have way too many clothes on," she tells him, undoing the button on his jeans. She lowers the zipper, teasing him through the cotton fabric of his boxers, and he moans. "Mel," he says, trying to keep himself in check. She bites her lip in response, and then laughs when he nearly jumps off the bed in his effort to remove the rest of his clothing.</p><p>"You're so beautiful," he says reverently as he leans over her, sliding his hands up under her shirt and reaching for the clasp of her bra. He kisses her, heatedly, his tongue exploring her mouth, and she can feel how much he wants her.</p><p>"Oh Jack," she moans, wrapping her legs around his waist and pressing herself up against him. And just then, there is a loud knock on the door.</p><p>Jack groans, pausing only for a second in his movement, before kissing her again. The knocking grows louder. "Mel?" a female voice calls, and Mel freezes, her hand on Jack's bare chest. "Mel, it's Stacey!" the voice says, "I see your car here!"</p><p>"Oh my God," Mel whispers to Jack, "It's Mark's sister. I have to answer the door. She nearly jumps out of bed, throwing him his discarding clothing and silently gesturing to the bathroom. "Just a minute!" she calls to Stacey through the door. She throws on her clothes quickly, running her hands through her hair as she switches on the lights and opens the door.</p><p>Jack breathes heavily as he tries to calm himself down in the bathroom. He isn't sure if he should hide out in there or reveal his presence to Mel's surprise guest, but when he hears that Stacey intends to stay the night, it's obvious that he can't hide in there much longer. He opens the door slowly and steps out.</p><p>"Jack," this is Stacey, Mark's sister," she says in introduction.</p><p>Jack reaches out his hand to Stacey, "Nice to meet you," he says politely. "I better go and help Preacher close," he says to Mel, nodding goodbye to both of them as he slips out the door.</p><p>Stacey turns to Mel, "That is the hottest lumberjack I've ever seen," she says. "Did I interrupt something?"</p><p>"No," Mel says with a shrug and a dismissive wave of her hand, "Jack dropped off something I had forgotten. He's just a friend."</p><p>Stacey raises her eyebrows suspiciously, "He didn't seem like just a friend there," she replies, studying Mel. They sit on the couch to talk, Stacey eventually getting to the purpose of her visit. She was never all that close with Stacey, so the fact that her former sister-in-law dropped in unannounced and expected to stay with Mel throws her for a loop. Not mention the fact that she also wants Mel's engagement ring. She lies awake that night, feeling restless and upset, and her thoughts drift back to Jack. She picks up her cell phone and looks at the time, wondering if he is still awake.</p><p>Jack paces around the empty bar, the events of the evening replaying on a loop through his mind. The cold shower he took did nothing to relieve the ache he feels for Mel and what almost happened between them, again. His phone vibrates on the counter, and he picks it up, wondering who would be texting him at this hour.</p><p>Are you still up? He reads the message from Mel, smiling to himself as he types his reply.</p><p>Yes. I can't stop thinking about you. Mel smiles as she reads his text.</p><p>Can we talk? Jack's stomach sinks a little at her reply. Maybe she is reconsidering what happened tonight. Maybe she is going to tell him she made a mistake again.</p><p>Come on over, I'm here. He replies, his heart already starting to pound as he waits for her arrival.</p><p>Around ten minutes later he hears her soft knock on the door of the bar. He unlocks it and she smiles shyly at him as she enters, wearing her pajamas.</p><p>"Did you walk here?" Jack asks as she takes off her coat and drapes it over a stool.</p><p>"Yes," Mel replies. "I didn't want to wake up Stacey since she decided to stay with me, uninvited, I might add."</p><p>Jack studies her, "Are you ok?"</p><p>"She came here to ask me for my engagement ring back," Mel explains. "It belonged to Mark's grandmother and she says she wants to keep it in the family."</p><p>"But you're part of Mark's family too," Jack says. "I mean, he gave it to you, right?"</p><p>"Right," Mel says. "I don't know what to do. And it's just…"</p><p>"Awkward?" Jack fills in for her, and she nods. "Do you want to give it to her? Because if you don't, then you shouldn't."</p><p>"Really?" Mel asks. "You don't think that's being selfish?"</p><p>"Not at all," he answers.</p><p>"Thanks," she replies. "You know, you're a really great friend," she says with a smile.</p><p>He smiles back, only briefly before looking away. She thinks she detects a flash of hurt in his eyes as he walks behind the bar, getting himself a glass of water.</p><p>"Jack," she begins, "About tonight—"</p><p>"It's ok," he interrupts, "You don't have to explain anything."</p><p>"Jack," she says again, more softly, in a way that makes him look directly at her. "Come here," she beckons, and he moves until he is standing in front of her.</p><p>She takes his hand in hers, running her thumb over the back of his hand. "I'm really sorry that Stacey interrupted us earlier."</p><p>"You are?" he questions.</p><p>"Yeah," she places her hands on either side of his face, pulling his mouth down to hers. He hesitates only for a second before opening his mouth to hers, kissing her passionately in return.</p><p>"Mel," he murmurs, his voice thick with desire. She takes him by the hand and leads him to the stairs, pulling him along behind her. She enters his room, closing the door behind them as she wraps her arms around his neck. Wordlessly, she kisses him again, her hands sliding down his chest and to the hem of his t-shirt, tugging at it impatiently. Jack wastes no time removing the shirt and tossing it aside as he does the same to her pajama top. He groans when he sees that she is bare underneath it, and he walks her backwards until she falls onto the bed, with him hovering over her.</p><p>He pauses to look at her, in his bed on his sheets, and the image fulfills every fantasy he's had since the night her met her. Her hair splayed over his pillow, her scent enveloping him. "Are you sure?" he asks again, needing her to confirm that this isn't a dream, it's real.</p><p>"Make love to me, Jack," she says breathlessly, and he doesn't need to be asked twice.</p><p>She stays the night with him, curled up in his arms. She wakes early, telling him she needs to get home before Stacey realizes that she's been gone. "Hopefully Stacey won't stay long," she says as she puts on her shoes and coat.</p><p>"Take her running," he suggests with a grin. "She'll love that."</p><p>She laughs. "You're ridiculous," she teases him. She gives him a lingering kiss goodbye with a promise to see him later, and heads back to the cabin with a smile on her face.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…Mel had kissed Jack when he was fixing the pillows behind her the night she was attacked?</p><p>Mel shifts in bed, trying to adjust the pillows behind her when one of them falls to the floor. "Here, let me," Jack says as he places the pillow back on the bed, his face only inches from hers. Their eyes lock, and Mel feels an unmistakable surge of desire rush through her body, her eyes darting between his eyes and his lips. He freezes, unable to look away, and she sees her desire reflecting in his clear blue eyes. Her heart starts pounding, and before she can change her mind, she places her palms on either side of his face and pulls him closer, giving him a quick kiss before retreating, waiting to gauge his reaction.</p><p>"Mel?" he whispers, a question. Is this ok? Are you sure? What does this mean? She can see the uncertainty marring his expression. Before she can think, she kisses him again, this time opening her mouth to his. It takes a second for him to react, and she feels his tongue slip between her lips, kissing her deeply. He is leaning over her, careful not to disturb her injured ankle. This time it is him who breaks the kiss.</p><p>"Are you sure you're ok?" he breathes, leaning his forehead against hers.</p><p>She nods, "Yes," she insists weakly, but he is not fooled.</p><p>"Do you want me to stay?" he asks.</p><p>"Yes," she admits, not meeting his gaze. He shucks off his jacket, placing it on the hook by the door before returning to her side. She pats the space on the bed next to her, and he removes his shoes before climbing in, propping up a pillow behind himself so that he can sit upright alongside her. He hears her sniffle and looks at her just as a tear begins its path down her cheek.</p><p>"Hey," he says, taking her hand in his, "You're ok, I'm not going anywhere. You're safe."</p><p>"I know," she says, wiping her tears away with her free hand. "It isn't that. It's just that…" she trails off.</p><p>"You can tell me anything," he reminds her, squeezing her hand gently for reassurance.</p><p>"I know," she replies. "That's the problem," she adds, under her breath.</p><p>"Mel," he whispers, raising their joined hands to his lips and kissing the back of her hand.</p><p>She sighs, "This would be a lot easier if you weren't so wonderful," she tells him.</p><p>"What?" he laughs in surprise.</p><p>"This, all of it," she replies. "You, Charmaine, the baby. I would have just stayed in L.A. and never returned. But I couldn't."</p><p>"Why not?" he wonders.</p><p>"Because I missed you," she says quietly.</p><p>"I missed you, too," he replies, "More than you know."</p><p>She turns to look at him now, her eyes still filled with unshed tears. Their eyes lock once more, and she feels it, this magnetic pull she always feels whenever she is close to him. He leans in, resting his forehead against hers.</p><p>"I'm not ready," she whispers. "I'm sorry. I know I'm being unfair to you."</p><p>"No," he insists, "You've been through a lot. More than I could even imagine…" he trails off before continuing. "Would things be any different if Charmaine weren't pregnant?" he asks quietly.</p><p>"I don't know," she answers honestly. "I care about you," she tells him, "A lot."</p><p>"But?" he questions.</p><p>"But I'm afraid," she adds.</p><p>"Of what?" he asks.</p><p>"Of this," she gestures between the two of them. "Of letting myself love you. What if I lose you, too? What if I can't give you what you deserve? I'm so broken, Jack."</p><p>"You're not broken, you're perfect," he insists, putting his arm around her and pulling her closer. She relaxes into him, resting her head on his shoulder.</p><p>"I am far from perfect," she replies. She sits up, gazing into his eyes, and her heart begins pounding again. "You're really not making this easy, you know that?" And with that, she kisses him.</p><p>Jack tries to hold himself back, he really does, but the feeling of her lips on his ignites something within him, and he presses his mouth against hers, his tongue tracing the seam of her lips. Then she does something unexpected, she half sighs, half moans into his mouth, and he swears it is the sexiest sound he has ever heard in his life. He twists towards her, hovering over her as she leans back onto the pillows, and kisses her deeply. Her hands are in his hair, anchoring his mouth to hers.</p><p>He breaks the kiss, wanting her more than he can say, but also knowing that she isn't ready. He leans his forehead against hers, trying to calm himself. "Mel," he breathes, opening his eyes to look into hers.</p><p>"I know," she whispers, her eyes filling with tears.</p><p>"Hey," he says, "What is it?"</p><p>"I'm just…overwhelmed," she replies, softly. "You're so wonderful, Jack."</p><p>He laughs halfheartedly. "Only when I am with you," he says, kissing her forehead and pulling her close again, holding her against his chest. "When I heard you screaming, it was like a knife stabbing me through my chest. If anything ever happened to you…"</p><p>"I know," she answers. "It's how I feel about you too, but I'm ok, Jack. You saved me, again."</p><p>"I would die before I let anything happen to you," he says honestly, and she knows it is the truth.</p><p>"Will you stay with me tonight?" she asks tentatively, turning to look at him. "Will you just…hold me?"</p><p>"As long as you want," he replies reassuringly. "How is your ankle?"</p><p>"Still a little sore, but feeling better. Must be the ibuprofen," she adds. She looks around the cabin, nervously. "I want to change into my pajamas, but I don't know if I can do it myself."</p><p>"Do you want me to help you?" he asks. "I promise to be on my best behavior," he adds, his eyes sparkling.</p><p>She directs him to find her pajamas in the dresser, and he helps her into the bathroom so that she can change. When she emerges, teeth brushed and face clean of makeup, he marvels that she is still the most beautiful woman that he's ever seen.</p><p>"What?" she asks when she catches him staring at her.</p><p>"You're beautiful," he says honestly, and she blushes.</p><p>"Jack," she murmurs, giving him a once over before she says, "I'm sorry that I don't have anything more comfortable for you to sleep in."</p><p>"It's ok," he replies. "I usually don't wear pajamas. Just a pair of shorts or pants is all. I'll be fine."</p><p>He disappears in the bathroom to freshen up and returns with his flannel shirt unbuttoned. Now it is Mel's turn to stare as he walks around the bed and sits on the edge as he removes his jeans and his shirt, leaving him only in a pair of boxer briefs.</p><p>Mel bites her lower lip and her eyes rake over his body as he stands and gets into bed, pulling the covers over him. "Oh, I'm sorry," he says to her as he takes in her expression, "Is this too much? Or not enough?"</p><p>"I'm not complaining," she says, biting her lip again, and it takes everything in his power not to devour her right then and there. She blushes, unable to meet his eyes, and he reaches out, tilting her chin up and forcing her to look at him.</p><p>"What is it?" he asks.</p><p>"You're beautiful," she tells him, echoing his words, and he smiles.</p><p>"Well," he whispers, his voice smooth like silk, "Looks like we belong together then."</p><p>She kisses him then, lightly at first, but it soon deepens. His hands are in her hair, holding her close, as hers explore his bare chest. He shivers at her touch, emitting a moan from deep in his throat that only serves to spur her on more. Abruptly, she breaks the kiss, breathing hard as she leans her head against his. "I'm so sorry," she murmurs.</p><p>"Never be sorry for that," he amends, and she smiles. He pulls her into a hug, cradling her against his body as they snuggle underneath the covers. She places her ear over his heart, loving the sound of it beating. She trails her fingertips lightly over his chest and sides, and she hears his heart stutter and begin beating rapidly, a smile forming on her lips.</p><p>"Thank you," she whispers into the darkness of the room.</p><p>"For what?" he asks.</p><p>"For saving me tonight. For being amazing. For always being there when I need you," she replies.</p><p>He smiles, wrapping his arms more tightly around her. "Always," he replies, as they drift off to sleep in each other's arms.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…Jack didn't read Charmaine's letter?</p><p>"I make great pancakes," she says to him with a knowing smile, and he feels another surge of desire course through his body.</p><p>"I bet you do," he replies, watching her disappear into the cabin. He wants nothing more than to go to her, haul her up against his body, and kiss her until he can't breathe, but he knows that she isn't ready for that. He drives slowly back to the bar, thinking about another restless night without her in his arms, knowing the cold showers in his future will do nothing to help. He pauses in the doorway to his office, considers reading the letter from Charmaine, but decides against it. This was a perfect evening with Mel, and he knows reading what is probably a desperate plea from Charmaine is not what he needs tonight. He trudges up the steps, his heart pounding as he thinks about the way Mel's lips felt against his tonight.</p><p>Mel climbs into bed, the events of the evening on her mind as she smiles to herself. Jack is a wonderful man, and she had a great time on their date. She allows herself a fleeting moment of hope for the future as she remembers how perfectly her hand fit in his, or how his eyes light up when he looks at her.</p><p>The next morning Mel awakens early and starts preparing for Jack's visit. She showers, dresses, and curls her hair. She sets out everything she needs to make the pancakes. Just as everything is ready, her cell phone rings.</p><p>"I really like him," she admits to Joey.</p><p>"He likes you too," Joey replies, "I could see it when I was there."</p><p>Mel smiles as she hears a knock on the door.</p><p>Jack wakes early, unable to sleep any longer. He paces around the bar, trying to busy himself with menial tasks until he waits for the agreed upon time to arrive at Mel's for breakfast. It amazes him how much he misses her, having only left her a few hours ago. He knows he has never felt this way for a woman before.</p><p>He pulls up in front of the cabin and parks, climbing out of his truck and walking up the path to knock on the door. He hears her voice say, "Hey, come in!" and he opens the door, finding her just hanging up the phone.</p><p>"So, I have a question to ask you," she says, walking toward him, "Semi-sweet, or dark chocolate?"</p><p>"Sorry?" he asks, momentarily distracted by how beautiful she looks this morning. Her hair is curled in perfect waves over her shoulders, the thin, flowy lavender top skimming gently over her curves.</p><p>"It's for the pancakes," she explains.</p><p>"Oh," he says, trying to compose himself. He can't help but smile when he looks at her. He folds his hands together nervously, glancing behind her into the kitchen. "Dark chocolate," he replies. "Need any help?"</p><p>"Sure," she smiles, "Make yourself comfortable. Want some coffee?"</p><p>"Yes, please," he answers, removing his jacket and hanging it on the hooks by the door. She pours coffee into a mug and hands it to him. He smiles gratefully, taking it from her and setting it on the table. She begins measuring the flour and pouring it into a bowl. "Here, let me do that," he says, stepping next to her at the counter. She hands it to him and goes to the refrigerator to get the eggs.</p><p>"I'm sure these won't be as good as Preacher's," she says shyly, "But I'll try."</p><p>"They'll be perfect," he says fondly, looking at her, unable to keep his eyes away from her lips. She blushes slightly before turning back to the task at hand, cracking the eggs against the side of the bowl and dropping the shells into the trashcan. Nervously, he brushes a strand of loose hair out of his eyes as he takes the spatula and begins mixing the ingredients together.</p><p>"We just need to add the milk," she says, suddenly nervous too. There is no denying the charged atmosphere in the room, and she wonders if he can feel it, too. She looks over at him and sees that he has flour on his temple. "Oh, you have a little bit of flour on you," she says lightly, walking over to him. "Let me get that," she tells him, her voice dropping to a whisper as her fingers make contact with his skin. He stills, his eyes locking with hers as she trails her fingers down the side of his face. She feels it then, the desire reflected in his crystal blue eyes, the heat radiating off his body. She can't ignore it. She wants him too.</p><p>But I have nothing to give him, she thinks for a moment. And yet, she does not want to imagine a life without him. She takes a tentative step towards him, and he remains perfectly still, watching her. She tilts her chin up, brushing her lips lightly against his before taking a step back to study his expression. When she sees nothing but fire in his eyes, she steps forward again, her lips meeting his in a passionate kiss. He hesitates only a second before he returns the kiss, his tongue tracing the seam of her lips. She threads her fingers into his hair with one hand, the other anchoring his body to hers. He lets out a low moan, which only spurs her on further.</p><p>Jack's head is spinning. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knows that she said that she needed to take things slowly, and he knows that he should stop her, but he finds himself unable to do anything logical other than kiss her senseless. He pushes her backward against the counter, his hips pressing into hers. She breaks the kiss, pausing to look at him, her skin flushed and breathing hard.</p><p>He reaches up and tucks a wayward strand of her hair behind her ear, his eyes asking her the question he cannot find the words to voice. "Is this ok? Do you want this too?"</p><p>She understands, and nods almost imperceptibly before pulling herself up to sit on the counter and reaching for him. This time, he doesn't hesitate at all. He steps closer to her, his hips bracketed by her thighs, and kisses her passionately. His hands are in her hair, skimming down her sides until they land on her hips, pulling her closer to him. She lets herself fall into him, into the moment, and releases a soft sigh into his mouth. "Jack," she breathes, and it is the sexiest thing he has ever heard.</p><p>"Mel," he replies, pausing to lean his forehead against hers. He looks into her eyes, expecting to see the sorrow, guilt, and conflict that he always sees there, and instead sees desire. He kisses her again with all the passion he can muster, trying to pour all that he feels for her into this single kiss. She moans, wrapping her legs around his waist, and suddenly he can't hold himself back any longer. He picks her up, carrying her towards the bed, his lips still fused to hers. He places her gently on the bed, hovering over her before kissing her again. His lips trail down her neck and onto the exposed bit of collarbone not hidden by her shirt, and he can feel her trembling underneath him. She pushes up against him, sitting up for a moment. She pulls her shirt up and over her head, leaving her in a lacy, light purple bra. He licks his lips as his eyes rake over her.</p><p>"You're beautiful," he whispers, and she smiles, reaching for the hem of his gray sweater and tugging it up. He pulls it up along with the t-shirt under it in one fluid motion, tossing it to the floor. She trails her hands down his bare chest and he shivers involuntarily, unable to stop his body from reacting to her touch.</p><p>She reaches up, cupping his cheek with her palm, steadying him before he begins kissing his way down her body. He rolls onto his side, his fingers hooking into the waistband of her jeans. She undoes the button, sliding the zipper down as she begins to shimmy out of them. He sits up and helps her, tossing them to the floor along with her socks. She reaches to remove his jeans, as well, and smiles at how quickly he has them off and joining the already growing pile of clothing next to the bed. She's left only in her bra and panties, and he in his boxers, and he pulls her flush against his body. She can feel his arousal for her and feels a wave of anxiety. It has been so long since she has been with a man like this, and even longer since she was with a man who wasn't Mark. Jack cradles her body against his, seeming to know what she needs without her saying. She realizes in this moment that she feels safe with him, she always has.</p><p>She sits up and reaches behind her back, unclasping her bra, letting it fall away as he watches, his expression a mixture of love, lust, and awe.</p><p>Jack swears he's never seen anyone or anything more beautiful than her. He sits up next to her, wrapping his arms around her and holding her close. He kisses her passionately, trying to show her with his mouth and his hands what he cannot yet put into words.</p><p>I love you.</p><p>-x-x-x-x-x-x-</p><p>He kisses her lightly one last time before rolling onto his side, propping himself up on his elbow so that he can look at her.</p><p>"How are you feeling?" he asks her.</p><p>She smiles, releasing a breath of air she didn't realize she was holding. "Wow," she says.</p><p>He grins, "Really?"</p><p>"Really," she replies, scooting closer to him on the mattress and curling her body against his. He feels himself begin reacting to her again, and he hears her laugh. "Again?" she asks as her stomach rumbles. "Can we have pancakes first?"</p><p>He laughs, "If you insist," he teases her, watching as she stands and pulls on her underwear and his discarded t-shirt, inhaling the scent of him as she puts it on. He climbs out of bed and steps into his boxers, bending to retrieve his jeans when he finds her staring at him, her lower lip clenched between her teeth.</p><p>"What?" he asks.</p><p>"That's a good look for you," she flirts, raising her eyebrows knowingly at him as she returns her attention to the pancake batter.</p><p>"That is a fantastic look for you," he replies, buttoning his jeans and walking over to stand behind her. She tries to concentrate on lighting the stove and mixing the batter, which becomes almost impossible with him so close. He brushes her hair over her shoulder, lowering his lips to her neck.</p><p>She shivers, leaning back into his touch before spinning around and kissing him deeply on the lips. She breaks away, leaving him panting, and turns back to the stove. "Later," she says, her voice full of promise. I'll make it worth your while, she thinks but doesn't say.</p><p>The batter sizzles as it hits the pan, and the cabin is filled with the smell of melting chocolate and pancakes. She heats up some maple syrup to go along with it, and soon even Jack's stomach is rumbling. He adds another log to the fire, pausing to look at the expanse of bare skin of Mel's legs, the t-shirt skimming to tops of her thighs. She's gorgeous standing there at the stove flipping pancakes, unconsciously humming to herself as she moves around the kitchen. He's drawn back to her side, helping her transfer the pancakes to their plates and pouring fresh mugs of coffee for them both.</p><p>They sit together at the table to eat, her hooking her ankle around his under the table. He smiles at her as he savors his first bite. "Delicious," he tells her.</p><p>"Thanks," she replies, appraising him as he still only wears a pair of jeans and nothing else. "That really is a good look for you. I could get used to this."</p><p>"Ditto," he winks at her, smiling as they eat together. It feels normal, natural to be sitting here with him having breakfast, she thinks.</p><p>"I had a great time last night," she tells him.</p><p>"Me too," he agrees.</p><p>"I know I said that I wanted to take things slowly," she says, "and I still do. I know this isn't though, really," she clarifies, gesturing between the two of them. "I'm still kind of messed up in here," she continues, pointing to her head and her heart, "but being with you feels right. And it's the first time in a long time that I felt safe again."</p><p>He nods, just listening to her.</p><p>"I'm still scared," she explains, "I've already lost so much. I can't help but think that you deserve better."</p><p>"Better than you?" he questions, and she nods. "Not possible."</p><p>"Jack," she begins, but he shakes his head.</p><p>"I knew it from the moment that we met," he tells her. "It just feels right somehow. Tell me you feel it too."</p><p>"I do," she agrees, her toes tickling his ankle and he laughs, pulling his leg away from her.</p><p>"You're killing me," he says with a sigh. "Are you ever going to give me my shirt back?"</p><p>She pushes away from the table and stands, giving him a mischievous look, her lower lip between her teeth. "Why don't you come and get it?" she retorts.</p><p>He doesn't need to be asked twice.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…Jack and Mel didn't run into the police the night after she stops him from kayaking?</p><p>"In a minute," Mel tells him, leaning over to rest her head on his shoulder. She needs to feel him close to her after fearing for his life only minutes before. She inhales deeply, trying to calm herself, hoping the clenching feeling in her stomach will subside with every breath.</p><p>Jack keeps himself still, breathing in the sweet smell of her hair. He loves having her this close, his inner thoughts in turmoil. They sit for a while in the silence, the sound of the rapids a soothing backdrop.</p><p>"I don't think you give yourself enough credit," Mel says finally, breaking the silence.</p><p>"What do you mean?" he questions.</p><p>"For what happened," she begins, "In the war. I know you are someone who always give his best. No one is more dedicated to doing what's right than you. You are the most honorable man that I know."</p><p>He laughs to himself, "I don't know about that. You didn't see me this afternoon. I went over to Charmaine's and she had baby stuff everywhere, and I just…I freaked out. I never really pictured myself as a father. And given the circumstances, it's just that much harder."</p><p>"I know," she sits up to look at him. "And I know you'll do your best. Did you tell Charmaine how you were feeling?"</p><p>"No," he admits. "I don't want her to think less of me. I'm already at a disadvantage here if I want to be part of the twins' lives. Fathers don't always get a fair shake when it comes to custody."</p><p>She nods, but doesn't reply. He can tell she is deep in thought about something. "What are you thinking?" he asks.</p><p>She stands, walking away from him. "I keep trying to figure out a way in my mind that this can all work out, that everyone can be happy. And I always hit a wall."</p><p>"Meaning?" he asks.</p><p>"Meaning I don't think Charmaine is ever going to be ok with me being in your life," she replies. She takes another breath as if she is about to say something else, and then stops.</p><p>He studies her, "And?" he says, encouraging her to continue.</p><p>"And I don't know if I'm ever going to be ok with her being in yours," she says quickly, looking away from him.</p><p>He sighs, "Mel," he begins, walking toward her. "It's you that I want, only you."</p><p>"And the twins?" Mel says. "You are their father. She is their mother. You are bound together, forever through them. Where do I factor into that?"</p><p>Jack stops walking and turns to her, taking her hand in his. "Mel," he says softly. "You'll be in their lives because you're in mine."</p><p>"You make it sound so simple," Mel replies. "Like what? A stepmother?" When Jack chuckles, she adds, "No please Jack, I really need to know how you see this working."</p><p>"Look," he begins, "I don't have all the details worked out. All I know is that I want you by my side. You keep saying that being with you prevents me from having a family, but we can all be a family, together."</p><p>Mel laughs, "Charmaine is never going to go for that."</p><p>"She doesn't get a say in who I love or who I choose to be with," he says.</p><p>"What if she tries to take the twins away from you? Then what?" Mel asks.</p><p>"Then I'll fight for my rights," Jack answers. "My sister is a lawyer, you know." He stops walking again and turns to Mel, "I know it's complicated. I know it isn't conventional or easy, but I also know that I've never been happier than I am when I'm with you."</p><p>"Jack," she whispers. He takes her hand again and they continue walking through the woods, darkness settling in all around them. They walk until they come to the road where his truck and her car are parked.</p><p>"Come to the bar," he suggests, "Have dinner with me?"</p><p>"Ok," she says, getting into her car. She follows him back to the bar, parking in back alongside his truck, and they walk in together in the midst of the dinner rush. She studies him as he rounds the bar and starts helping customers immediately before heading upstairs to change his clothes. Preacher emerges and nods in greeting to Mel.</p><p>"Thank you," he says to Mel. "I knew if he would listen to anyone, it would be you."</p><p>"I'm worried about him," Mel replies.</p><p>"Me too," Preacher says, reaching over the bar and patting her on the back of her hand.</p><p>Jack returns, holding two steaming plates of food, and sets one down in front of Mel before taking a seat at the bar next to her.</p><p>"So how are you doing?" he asks her, "Did you decide what to do for Mark?"</p><p>"Yes, actually," she replies, giving him the details of what she did with Doc and Hope. "I actually was there when Preacher called me."</p><p>"Oh, I'm sorry," he answers, "I didn't mean to take away from your plans."</p><p>"No, don't worry about it," Mel says with a smile. "You're important to me."</p><p>Jack returns the smile, holding her gaze for a while before looking back down at his plate. "Thank you, again, for talking some sense into me."</p><p>"Anytime," Mel replies, still smiling, her stomach doing a little flip at the intensity of his stare. They continue eating, Jack occasionally interrupted by the other patrons in the bar and helping to run the business. Mel stays, talking and joking around with him, until the bar empties out for the night. "I think I'm going to head home," she tells Jack.</p><p>"Let me go with you," he offers, "To make sure you're safe."</p><p>"Jack," she sighs, "I'll be fine. It's within walking distance."</p><p>"I'll follow you in my truck. Please, I insist," he holds up his hands, letting her know that he isn't going to back down, and finally she nods in agreement. She drives the short distance to the cabin with him following behind her. They park in her driveway and he walks her to the door.</p><p>"Want to come in for a bit?" she asks him tentatively. He still doesn't seem quite like himself tonight, and she doesn't want to leave him alone just yet.</p><p>"Yeah, sure," he agrees, holding the door open for her while she unlocks it and following her inside. He goes to the fireplace to strike a match, setting it on the logs to start a fire.</p><p>"Can I take your jacket?" Mel asks, reaching out her hand. He removes his jacket and hands it to her, rubbing his hands together nervously as he glances inadvertently towards the bed. "Are you sure you're ok?" she asks him.</p><p>"Yeah," he replies, although halfheartedly.</p><p>"You know you can talk to me about anything," she reminds him.</p><p>"I know," he responds before adding, "Thank you."</p><p>"I can't imagine what it was like for you," she begins, "In the marines. But I want to help you. Why don't you ever talk about it?"</p><p>"Because I don't want to remember," he replies, looking down at his hands.</p><p>"I blamed myself too, you know," she tells him, "When my baby died, and Mark. We were arguing when the accident happened. He wanted to stop the fertility treatments we were doing, and I didn't. He took his eyes off the road to look at me, and then…" she trails off.</p><p>Jack takes her hand in his, giving it a gentle squeeze, "It's not your fault," he replies. "It was an accident."</p><p>"I know," she responds, "But it didn't stop me from blaming myself. And that is what you're doing too. You can't hold yourself responsible for what happened. It was war."</p><p>"I was in charge," Jack replies, "I was their leader. He was following me, under my orders."</p><p>"But you had no way of knowing what was going to happen. If you did, you would have made a different decision, right?"</p><p>" Of course," he responds. "You know I was there with him when he died. I held him, talked to him. It still haunts me, every day."</p><p>" Jack," she whispers. She reaches for his other hand, so that they are sitting on the sofa facing each other, his hands in hers. Their eyes lock again, and Mel's stomach does another little flip. She leans forward, resting her forehead against his. "I'm here," she says softly.</p><p>"I know," he replies, his voice low. He presses a light kiss to her forehead, noticing how her breath catches in her throat, and her entire body stills at the touch of his lips to her skin. He pulls back, his gaze darting between her eyes and her lips.</p><p>Before Mel realizes what is happening, she finds herself learning toward him, her eyes locked on his. She kisses him lightly at first before she feels him respond, his hands threading through her hair, anchoring her mouth to his. She presses into him, pushing him backwards until he is leaning into the cushions. He lets out a low moan as she slides her tongue into his mouth, tangling it with his. She slings her leg over his hips, straddling him as they kiss, his hands everywhere.</p><p>"Mel," he whispers, breaking the kiss to look at her. She pauses, the moment bringing her back to reality for a heartbeat. She looks at him, his skin flushed, his mouth partially open, his lips wearing a hint of her lip gloss. A wave of desire surges throughout her entire body as she looks at him, and she knows that she wants him, that needs to feel him.</p><p>"Jack," she replies, her tone matching his. She stands, pulling him up by the hand from the couch, and leading him over to her bed. This is why you haven't allowed yourself to be alone with him, her subconscious chastises her. You knew this is what would happen if you were. You can't fight it anymore.</p><p>She turns to face him, and he is breathing hard as she reaches for the buttons of his shirt. "Are you sure?" he asks, a hint of hurt in his gaze, and she knows what he must be thinking. That she will wake up regretting this tomorrow. That she will push him away again.</p><p>She looks straight into his gorgeous blue eyes. "Yes," she whispers, and it is all the encouragement he needs. He picks her up, carrying her to the bed, his lips locked on hers. "I need you," she breathes as he hovers over her.</p><p>"You're all I'll ever need," he replies, covering her mouth with his own.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
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    <p>…Jack finds out he isn't the father of Charmaine's twins?</p><p>Jack races to Charmaine's apartment after receiving the text that said it was an emergency and Charmaine needed him right away. A million different harrowing scenarios cycle through his brain as he drives, his hands gripping the steering wheel tightly.</p><p>He unlocks the door to her apartment, rushing inside. "Char?" he calls. When he realizes the 'emergency' is only a clogged drain, he is relieved, albeit annoyed. He sets to work on fixing it for her, realizing that situations like this will not be ending any time soon. He is tied to Charmaine now, for life. His thoughts keep drifting back to the situation with Spencer, and of Mel declaring her love for him. He smiles at the thought as he picks up a pipe wrench, tightening the connections under the sink.</p><p>When Charmaine kisses him, he recoils. "What are you doing?" he questions. He tries to keep her calm, neither confirming nor denying her claims that he is in love with Mel, which he is. He knows the situation with her is precarious, and he knows he wants to be in his kids' lives. He collects his tools and quickly leaves, Charmaine seething in the other room.</p><p>It isn't until he is in his truck and already pulling away that he notices that he left his work light inside. Sighing heavily, he trudges back to the door and opens it, not wanting to engage in conversation with Charmaine again. He pauses in the doorway as he hears her voice, sounding like she is on the phone with someone.</p><p>"No, just now," Charmaine says. "I tried but he pulled away, again. Nothing seems to be working. I mean, he thinks I'm having his babies. Why couldn't Mel have just stayed away like I told her to? She ruined everything?"</p><p>As Jack processes what he just heard, the bedroom door opens and Charmaine emerges, her cell phone pressed to her ear. She stops dead in her tracks when she seems him standing there, his mouth open, jaw slack in shock.</p><p>"What did you mean just then?" he questions, "When you said I think the twins are mine? Are they not?"</p><p>Charmaine ends the call abruptly, turning to face him. She hesitates, and he gives her a warning look. "No, they're not," she reluctantly admits.</p><p>Jack closes his eyes, breathing deeply in an effort to calm himself, and when he opens them they are shining with unshed tears. "And when you said you told Mel to leave, did you?" he asks.</p><p>"Yes," she admits, not looking at him.</p><p>"When?" he asks.</p><p>"The day you and I had breakfast and we talked about the pregnancy. I ran into her at the coffee shop. I told her it would be better for our family if she wasn't in the picture," she explains.</p><p>Jack begins to pace around the room, rubbing his face with his hands. "I can't believe this," he says. "How could you do this to me?"</p><p>"I knew I was losing you and I just couldn't. I love you, Jack," she begins to sob.</p><p>"Don't," he interjects. "This isn't love. Do you have any idea the pain you've caused? For me? For Mel?"</p><p>"Oh of course," Charmaine sneers bitterly, "Everything is always about Mel. What about us?"</p><p>"There is no us," Jack responds. "Mel and I love each other. This is over. It has been for a while."</p><p>"How sweet," Charmaine replies, rolling her eyes.</p><p>"Who is the father?" he asks.</p><p>"It doesn't matter," she responds. "I told him about the pregnancy, and he wanted nothing to do with me or the babies. You were gone and I was desperate. You're the one I want, the one I have always wanted a family with. I thought that maybe if we spent enough time together, you might love me back. But she had to come back and ruin everything."</p><p>"Mel didn't ruin anything," Jack clarifies. "There is no us. There never was. For me, things were always casual. I didn't mean to hurt you, and I'm sorry that I did. I truly am. But what you did here is wrong."</p><p>"Jack," she pleads, but he shakes his head and heads for the door, wondering how he is going to explain this to Mel.</p><p>-x-x-x-x-x-x-</p><p>Mel hears a knock on the door and opens it to reveal Jack, shuffling nervously on his feet. "Come in," she tells him, showing him the video of Spencer getting on the bus with his family that she got from Brady and explaining the situation to him. She can see the weight of his grief lifting away, but something in his expression still isn't right. "What's wrong?" she asks. "I thought you'd be happy."</p><p>"I am," he insists, reaching for her hand and squeezing it. "There's something I need to talk to you about."</p><p>"Ok," she says nervously, allowing him to lead her to the sofa and sitting down beside him.</p><p>"I was with Charmaine today. She needed help with a clogged drain and I told her about the house I got for the twins," he flinches on the last word. "Well, she thought that I meant she and I would be living there together and she kissed me."</p><p>"What?" Mel exclaims, incredulous.</p><p>Jack holds up his hand, signaling that he wants to continue. "And we had an argument and I left. But in my haste, I left behind my work light, so I went back inside to get it, and I heard her on the phone telling someone that I'm not the father of the twins." Mel gasps, and he squeezes her hand again. "I confronted Charmaine and she admitted it. She also told me that she told you to leave town."</p><p>"Yes, she did," Mel replies. "She said it was her only chance for her to have a family. For you to choose her."</p><p>"I wouldn't have chosen her anyway," he insists. "I choose you. I have from the moment we met."</p><p>"I know," she whispers, studying him. "Are you ok?'</p><p>"Yeah," he tells her. "Honestly, I'm relieved, mostly. Not that I wasn't happy to be a father, but because it wasn't exactly an ideal situation."</p><p>"And it was your chance at having a family," she says softly, not looking at him. "You know I can't give you that."</p><p>"Hey," he says. "Hey," he insists, tilting her chin up with his finger so that she has to look at him. "I want you. I am in love with you. I want to be with you. You are my family now."</p><p>"Jack," she murmurs. "I love you too, for the record," she adds, and he smiles. "Ugh, I'm so mad that she lied to you, to everyone! What if you never found out?"</p><p>"I know," he answers, standing up to pace the room again. "I would have spent the next 18 years raising them."</p><p>"And the rest of your life loving them," she adds quietly, standing and walking over to him, pulling him into a hug. They embrace for a moment, his head burrowed in the crook of her neck. He inhales the scent of her, his lips brushing against the sensitive skin under her jawline. "Jack," she whispers, and he hears the longing in her voice, the desire.</p><p>"I love you," he whispers, kissing her deeply. He feels the moisture on her face and pulls away, concerned. "Mel?" he questions.</p><p>"I'm so sorry, Jack," she says honestly, aware of the magnitude of what he has lost, what was never really his to begin with. He says nothing, his expression revealing his sorrow, love, adoration, and desire all wrapped up in one look. She kisses him again, needing to feel closer to him. He reaches for the buttons on her shirt, undoing them slowly as he works his way down her body.</p><p>This time is different from their first, she realizes, as she removes his shirt too, adding it to the growing pile of clothing on the floor. And even thought it is slow, sensual, and romantic, the passion she felt for him their first time only continues to grow and expand. They are so focused on each other, on being present in this moment, that they do not even make it to the bed.</p><p>After, she stares at him in the glow of the firelight, loving him even more in this moment than she ever thought possible. "Again?" she teases him when he deepens their kiss, rolling back on top of her. She ignores the rumbling in her stomach as she wraps her arms tightly around his back, their lips fused together.</p><p>They still don't make it to the bed.</p>
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